Review of Thomas James' Domestic Violence: The 12 Things You Aren't Supposed to Know

by SAFE Speaker Jack Turteltaub

Thomas James has written a hard-hitting and incisive book focusing on current myths about domestic violence in the United States that turns the conventional approach on its ear (Domestic Violence: The 12 Things You Aren't Supposed to Know). A practicing attorney in Minnesota and founder/director of Better Resolutions Mediation Service, James’s short, quotable book focuses on empirical studies and an extensive review of the literature to make a powerful argument that women are as violent as men, while our legal system is biased against men and refuses to hold females accountable when they are violent.

Based on this information, James’ first twelve chapters are small essays, each addressing one of the dozen "things" cited in his title. In the 13th and final chapter, he marshals his chilling conclusions from the research literature: men are victimized more often than women and violence against them by females is just as severe as violence against women. Women are the primary abusers of children and most of their young victims are male. Criminal statistics show, in spite of a rising chorus of voices denouncing violence against women, that violence against males over at least the past twenty years has been rising, while conversely, violence against women has been decreasing. The same statistics reveal that violence perpetrated by females, in general, has been on the rise.

In his most startling chapters, James makes a forceful but controversial assertion that domestic violence against men, rather than racial crimes, are the most under-reported crimes, citing factors that include masculine cultural conditioning about not admitting they are victims and mens’ real fears about seeking justice in a legal system that favors women. James demonstrates systemic bias by some lawyers, police and judges toward men based on the assumption that they are more violent. Assumptions that have been uncritically accepted by many in the legal system include the belief that women are rarely violent, except in self-defense situations.

Thomas also cites chilling statistics showing males, not females, as victims of bias in the legal system, noting that men are charged and convicted for all crimes proportionately far more often than females, and when convicted for essentially the same crimes, even capital crimes, face far more serious sanctions (including longer sentences, a vastly higher likelihood of execution and far more restrictive conditions under their sentences).

A glaring example of this bias is that women, as the primary abusers of children, face minimal consequences for their actions. Sexual abuse of children, while representing less than 10 % of abuse crimes against them, are primarily committed by men and yet are prosecuted far more often and more forcefully than physical abuse by adult females, which constitute the vast majority of such crimes.

When child custody is an issue, males are at an even greater disadvantage-in spite of the clear statistics about the preponderance of child abusers being female. Even when there is significant evidence that a mother is not a fit parent, fathers are correct in their assessment that they are unlikely to win sole custody, primary custody, or be able to significantly limit their childrens’ contact with abusive mothers.

Thomas also skewers the current "research base" for domestic violence, noting that much of the purported "research" into domestic violence is characterized by critical flaws; on an intellectual level, these problems included deep-seated prejudices against males based on many researchers’ feminist-based assumptions about the inherently violent nature of males, the unacceptability of all male violence (even it is for self-defense) against females, and the presumptively defensive or insignificant nature of violence by women toward their male victims. Data about female perpetrators of child abuse are apparently overlooked (see above).

In the domestic violence research world, feminist assumptions-many contradicting better designed studies or more reliable crime data- have tremendous influence on how questions are framed, what questions are asked, who is surveyed, and how slanted data are then interpreted to support these pre-existing assumptions. Such studies are based on a circular logic that calls women "victims" and men "batterers."

As an example, James cites studies that ask women to report if they have ever been abused according to an extremely generous definition of abuse, then assumes that all instances of abuse reported has been, naturally, perpetrated by their male domestic partners. This "data" is then reported as reliable , and more importantly, valid. The data is then interpreted to make questionable or untenable conclusions that support the original, simplistic assumptions.

On the back cover of his book, it is noted that in Minnesota, James "served as co-counsel on the recent class action lawsuit to declare the Battered Women’s Act (VAWA) unconstitutional." Based on the well-researched, articulate and compelling arguments in his new book, James is a powerful advocate for social and legal changes. The implications of his book are extremely disturbing and join a growing number of books (like SAFE program director’s Phil Cook’s "Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence") and research that question the current paradigm.

Thomas portrays a a legal system apparently so intent on correcting past injustices against women that males are now consistently held to a much tougher standard. Not only are females given the benefit of the doubt, much of their violence is viewed as purely defensive or due to factors excusing them from responsibility when they are violent. Many people in our justice system have bought into specious arguments supporting a gender-based mythology as well as uncritically accepting as truth a specific ideology that not only skews the realities of domestic violence but has profoundly negative consequences for males-victims and perpetrators-of all ages.

Hard-core feminists who view all women as incapable of violence and all men automatically guilty because of their gender and domestic violence advocates who who don’t care about "the facts" will surely attack this book on emotional grounds, but they will have trouble logically refuting the author’s impressive grasp of the research literature, including some of its glaring flaws (as cited above). Advocates of a balanced and fair approach to domestic violence, individuals and organizations fighting for the civil rights of men and equal justice under the law regardless of gender should welcome this powerful indictment of our society’s response to domestic abuse and the systematic mistreatment of males under our current approach.

You can read a PDF excerpt of his book, or purchase it through Amazon (a small portion of proceeds purchased through this link go to SAFE): Domestic Violence: The 12 Things You Aren't Supposed to Know.